Friday, November 14, 2014

Here's a story...of a happy fat kid.

For as long as I can remember, Obesity has played a lead role in my life.
What? Is that a little heavy of a start to this post? Welp, it's the truth and this is my story, full of those "heavy" moments in oh so many ways. Buckle up.

I grew up in a wonderfully supportive, loving and encouraging, Christ centered family environment and would not trade my amazingly crazy family for anything. But I do think the three Sorenson girls could have dealt without the weight. Literally.
With genetically slow metabolisms from the start, we were just always happy fat kids. I know how hard this had to have been on my very "normal" sized parents as they watched their daughters grow up; but, I have to say it didn't hold us back. Perhaps, that's why it took so long to find my way into a new healthy lifestyle ...there just wasn't much I felt held back from!
Thank you Early 90's for the jewel tones and socks with loafers.
I have always been an over-involved girl, taking on any leadership roles, opportunities to perform and, of course, making new friends at every chance I get. Personality, self-esteem, and drive never fell victim to excessive weight which is why I think getting the weight off always took the backseat on the priority list.
Senior Banquet with my beautiful (and noticeably smaller) parents, 2006
Weight Watchers was a common thread in our home, by the time I hit middle school and we settled our Air Force family down in San Antonio, Texas, for what would become the long haul. "How many points is that" was a regular family phrase, and alongside Curves or whatever other "exercise" regimen, participating in the program with my supportive mama led to 30 pounds down here, 40 pounds down there. But keeping up with high school, extra curriculars, and a social life to boot never left anything sticking around.
High School Graduation 2006 after singing our Alma Mater for our graduating class. Strike Em Rattlers.
I don't even know that I noticed my peek weight but I sure did ride that roller coaster up and down and into college, never losing more than 50 pounds or so, but always sure to put it back on without truly noticing. I'm sure college allnighters, drinking and college food habits consistently played into it, but it still never really held me back. I watched as my two older sisters lost over 100 pounds each at different times...and then put it back on and I just didn't understand what it would take or why God wouldn't just fix it.

The Lord kept bringing me to a scripture through my prayers, through my friends, and through different experiences and convictions in my struggle with weight.
1 Corinthians 6:19-20
"Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own, you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body"
I began sharing my struggle with friends and using it as a point of relation to friends who confided in me their own struggles. While I don't doubt the Lord created me to be empathetic and intentional with these friendships and relationships, I can now see that my struggle with obesity was a crutch, but not something I was willing to turn over to God and His sovereignty. "Rejoice in Hope, Be Patient in Tribulation, Be Constant in Prayer"...Romans 12:12 was another scripture ticker-taping through my brain as I tried to pray away my tribulations and those of my friends, whatever they were. But it wasn't God not hearing my prayers, it was me not leaving anything more than words at His feet.

Seeking the Lord's plan in every nook and cranny of my oh-so-defining college years, I could not understand why I could not just give this over to God and honor him in that surrender. But my selfish control and pride would not free me to His grace in my struggle with weight.
Baylor Graduation, May 2010. Sic Em Bears.
It wasn't until I graduated in the pit of our economy, with no job and no plan, and had to head back home to San Antonio, that I truly found a place uncomfortable enough, I had no other choice but to see God flagging me down. With the unending support of my parents, I joined a gym, where I was handed over to a pesky trainer, who would become one of my closest friends for the next 14 months. I soon learned that the Lord had gifted me this time of living with my parents who supported my healthy eating changes, and being able to spend 3-4 days a week with my trainer. As I began to accept the Lord's plan in this and truly just submit my struggle to HIM, I began to see a determination and a desire for this change that I had never seen before. God met me where I was, in a frustrated pit of not knowing what was next, and He planted a seed in me to pursue HIS purpose with my body and with my life. I spent the next year doing "crossfit" style workouts with my trainer and watching as I developed a love for working out and the thrill of my body changing shape. It was literally just eating the right foods and exercising, but at the core of it, I knew I was doing it to honor the Lord.
August 2011 as I prepared to move to Dallas and leave my beloved, trainer, Byron.
Just over a year later, God opened up incredible doors for me to take an amazing job in Dallas. Before I knew it, I was saying goodbye to my trainer and shipping off 5 hours north on 35. My first free weekend had me signing up for a free trial at Crossfit Strong. I left that morning in tears...of joy. I knew this would be my home to continue my journey of this healthy lifestyle...and 3 years later, it still is. Moving out of a house where my dad prepped chicken and salads for lunches, and my parents and I shared in healthy dinners together was a hard transition but I quickly found a passion for cooking. Nutrition and knowing the WHY's of what I believe is a healthy eating lifestyle continues to drive my passion for clean eating and fueling my body.

In the midst of a (very) busy life, I have found some of my greatest joy in pleasing God by treating my body as HIS temple. When I put good things into my body and push myself in the gym, I see results. But I see even better results when I do it for His Glory, knowing He has already overcome this for me. 

Over the last 4 years, I have still seen ups and downs. I have had great wins, and hard defeats. I have fallen short and into food traps or social-life eating and drinking habits. I have completed numerous Paleo/Clean eating challenges. I have been through A LOT of clothing.
It's hard work and I sometimes buy into the satan's lies that it would just be easier to just be the big girl and not fight this. But my God is Greater, Stronger, and Higher than any other. He continues to meet me where I am, often with friendships and accountability to help me through, because He intends more for me than being the happy fat kid.
People ask what my goal is...there is no number...mainly because I don't even know what that looks like. But there is a hope that I can honor God, roll these successes up into praise to Him, inspire others to seek the same...and ya know, be really strong too.

This is my journey. My forever journey. And I'm thankful for it, even in the trials. This is my way of finding fit, in all the ways.

With a heart of gratitude (especially if you made it through the novel)
Finding Fit,

1 comment:

  1. Lisa! Thank you so much for sharing your story and struggle! Authenticity is rare in our world, so I am especially grateful for it! I praise God for bringing you into my life through strong! I love sharing laughter, dancing and Jesus with you as we lift heavy stuff! you're a keeper. xx